I sit alone and contemplate. Moments from months ago, I started to reminisce. I didn’t ask for what happened. But, it did. And I’m left more in thought than before.
Whenever something bad happens to me, I try to approach it at every angle– the point of the view of the offender, the point of view of the enabler, the point of view of the victim, and the point of view of those who simply don’t care or choose not to do anything.
I’ve had to be my own “savior”, sometimes, as I obey God’s voice for my own good.
I write to you today, hopefully not to extract any form of justification from an awful event. I know what happened. And I am not one to gaslight myself into reshaping an already horrendous narrative. I want to face this head on because I respect myself too much. I love myself, as God loves me.
But, I do write to you because I know what it is like to be enslaved by one’s own sinful nature. And as much as I want to cancel everyone who has done me wrong, with each living in his or her favorite sin, all I find myself doing is lending a hand. Because I have been there. I know what being enslaved by sin feels like. And how it can be so dangerous, living apart from the saving hand of God.
Self-control is often a very overlooked trait. It is the fruit of the Holy Spirit, but some take it for granted. Come to think about it, without self-control, our sinful nature is bound to take over. Nothing would keep us from doing what we ought not to do. And we are bound to suffer the penalty of letting sin rule over our lives.
What’s worse is that we ought to blame anyone, anything else for our lack of self-control. Instead of taking accountability for what we have done. This is the ugly truth. This is human nature.
Yet, for some who’ve taken the more noble path, it is not just enough to admit we were in the wrong. We must be absorbed by the reality that we are all in the process of sanctification. And until we are not anymore, we have a responsibility to work with Christ to look more like Him.
Jesus Christ is returning to a spotless bride, a spotless church. And we have a responsibility to go through the process of sanctification every waking day of our lives. Remember that God does not tempt us; Our own fleshly desires do (James 1:13-14).
Now, think about your favorite sin. Here’s how you can combat it– here’s how to practice self-control:
1. Keep on Choosing Jesus
Your love for God must be stronger than your natural instincts– until complete obedience to Him becomes what is natural to you.
The truth is the Christian life can be somewhat like a paradox. In fact, according to Paul:
Romans 7:15-20 (ESV)
“15 For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. 16 Now if I do what I do not want, I agree with the law, that it is good. 17 So now it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. 18 For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. 19 For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing. 20 Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me.”
At one point, we find ourselves desiring to live like Christ. At another, we find ourselves doing the complete opposite. Paul, in this passage, had described the complex reality of living in the flesh, the constant battle against sin, while not undermining the truth that there are forces beyond our control.
We must keep on choosing Jesus and crucify the flesh, nonetheless.
Galatians 5:17-21 (ESV)
“17 For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do. 18 But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. 19 Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, 20 idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, 21 envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.”
How do we crucify the flesh? – through constant and consistent obedience to the Lord in everything we do.
Luke 4:8 (ESV)
“And Jesus answered him, “It is written, “‘You shall worship the Lord your God, and him only shall you serve.’”
I do understand that obedience can be difficult, especially if what is demanded is complete and whole obedience. At this stage, I want you to take your focus from a to-do list to enjoying a loving relationship with your Creator– with the One who loves you most.
When you get so encapsulated, engrossed in loving God, it won’t even feel like work; you’d obey because of love. You’d obey from love. You’d obey with love. Life in obedience to Christ doesn’t have to feel like work for work is not the be-all end-all in the Christian life. Love is.
Take time to know God today. Read His Word. Pray. Worship.
Take time to fall in love with God– and let that love fuel your decisions.
John 14:15 (ESV)
“15 (Jesus said) “If you love me, you will keep my commandments.””
2. “What Implication?”
We sometimes fail to practice self-control because we don’t weigh the implications of our actions. In this case, we must conjure wisdom in order to see things clearly.
Proverbs 1:20 (ESV)
“20 Wisdom cries aloud in the street, in the markets she raises her voice;”
Ask yourself this question: if I lose myself in this today, would I regret it in the future?
Idolizing a thing or a person can consume you. And anything or anyone else that consumes you apart from God is bound to take from you your self-control. Sin might feel good (i.e. because it feels natural– due to our sinful nature). But, think of what it will do to you, your relationship with God, and other people.
3. Think win-win
Some of us– chances are you’re in a difficult route. You might find yourself stuck between a rock and a hard thing. It’s possible that you’re under some form of trial and attribute such trial to your relationship with Christ. Some are experiencing persecution or troubles. You’re on the edge. And you’re about to lose any sense of self-control. But, think win-win.
Choose wisely today. Work with God today– for in order to practice self-control, you must develop a heart that loves God completely, wholly, and firstly.
In this life, we’re bound to experience hardships anyways. Think win-win; go through the hardship with and for Christ. In that way, your sufferings will not be in vain.
Galatians 6:9 (ESV)
“9 And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.”
John 16:33 (ESV)
“33 I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”
Philippians 3:14 (ESV)
“14 I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus”
I still find myself sitting down, as I knit the last few paragraphs of this piece. With more awareness now, my empathy is activated. Indeed, if we don’t practice self-control, life’s going to get the best of us. If we don’t practice self-control, we continue to be minions– enslaved.
All this when we can be living a life free from the shackles of sin. All this when we can be living the life that Christ has died for.