I know I had to write you a goodbye letter. And this is not one that actually closes the book on what could be, but a goodbye letter that asks permission.

I want to ask permission to fall in love again. To choose a life with someone who is not you. And for him to take the place you used to own in my heart.

I want to recognize our agreement. And to settle with the thought that something actually went on with us. And that maybe we were just too scared to act on our feelings. Or too blind to see what each other needed. Or maybe I was just too sick to attend to you- to actually choose us.I want to acknowledge that for a moment in my life, I wanted you there with me. And that I did try to build a future for us.

I am writing this letter still aware of His hands. And the endless possibility of two souls finding their way back to each other. Intertwined by prayers. I want to find my way back to you and rekindle what we had. Maybe as different people now. Just for the sake of closure and attaining full realization of God’s will- whatever that may be.

Then again, I guess this goodbye letter is not really true to its essence.

But, goodbye for now. I will always have you in my memories, as you once occupied every space in my heart- next to God.